Transparent Inglês
Menu
Search

Humor in (clean) English! Posted by on Feb 13, 2012 in Intermediário

Hi, there!

Vamos começar a semana esperando ansiosos o Carnaval e com um pouco de humor em inglês.

Anesthesia

A man was just coming out of anesthesia after a series of tests in the hospital, and his wife was sitting at his bedside.
Um homem estava saindo da anestesia depois de uma série de exames no hospital e sua esposa estava sentada ao seu lado.

His eyes fluttered open, and he murmured, “You’re beautiful.”
Seus olhos tremiam e ele murmurou, “Você é bonita.”

Flattered, the wife continued her vigil while he drifted back to sleep.
Lisonjeada, a esposa continuou sua vigilha enquanto ele voltou a dormir.

Later, her husband woke up and said, “You’re cute.”
Mais tarde ele acordou e disse, “Você é bonitinha.”

Startled, she asked him, “What happened to beautiful?”
Assustada, ela perguntou a ele, “O que aconteceu com o bonita?”

“The drugs are wearing off,” he replied.
“A anestesia está acabando,” ele respondeu.

Whisper

A young couple was expecting a visit from the pastor of their church. They wanted everything to go smoothly, but their two- year-old son was just getting the hang of potty training. He was at the stage where he would announce at the top of his voice, “I gotta pee,” when he had to go to the bathroom.
Um jovem casal estava esperando a visita de um pastor de sua igreja. Eles queriam que tudo desse certo mas seu filho de dois anos estava começando a aprender a urinar no vaso. Ele estava na fase onde ele anunciava em voz alta, “Tenho que fazer xixi,” quando tinha que ir ao banheiro.

His father, worried that this might be embarrassing when the minister came to call, instructed the child, “Don’t shout that you’ve got to pee, whisper!”
O pai, preocupado que isso pudesser envergonhá-lo quando o ministro viesse visitar, instruiu o filho, “Não grite que você tem que fazer xixi, sussurre!”

That evening the pastor makes his visit. He’s there a very long time and the two-year-old is on one foot and the other.
Naquela noite o pastor faz sua visita. Ele fica lá um bom tempo e o menino de dois anos fica num pé e no outro.

Finally, the minister asks him, “What’s the matter, son?”
Finalmente, o ministro lhe pergunta, “Qual é o problema, filho?”

The child looks at his dad and says, “I’ve gotta whisper!”
A criança olha para o seu pai e diz, “Tenho que sussurar!”

Pastor says, “It’s all right, child. Whisper in my ear.”
O pastor diz, “Tudo bem, criança. Sussurre no meu ouvido.”

Tags:
Keep learning Inglês with us!

Build vocabulary, practice pronunciation, and more with Transparent Language Online. Available anytime, anywhere, on any device.

Try it Free Find it at your Library
Share this:
Pin it

About the Author: Adir

English / Spanish teacher and translator for over 20 years. I have been blogging since 2007 and I am also a professional singer in my spare time.


Comments:

  1. SERGIO:

    Gr8!