Russian Language Blog

In the US there is a good saying “woman’s work is never done”. Or as Russian women might say делам по дому конца краю не видно (lit. can’t see the end to house work). So what is considered женская работа (woman’s work) in Russian households? Let’s find out and, since house chores have to be done no matter where in the world you live, let’s learn some useful phrases along the way.

Let’s start with распределение домашних дел (division of chores) or figuring out who does what in a household. In Russia, with its more traditional approach to gender roles, most routine chores are a woman’s domain. As some women (and men) say у нас распределение обязанностей – муж зарабатывает, жена на хозяйстве и деньги тратит (our division of responsibilities is the husband earns and the wife keeps the house and spends).

Grammar Note: since chores are by their nature repetitive activities that never end (sigh), we use imperfective aspect a lot unless we are talking about our to-do list for a particular day:

Мыть полы и стирать бельё – это женская работа (To mop floors is woman’s work)

Сегодня мне нужно помыть пол и постирать (Today I must mop the floor and do laundry)

Some of these housekeeping responsibilities include

Уборка (n. cleaning) – some women prefer to have one day a week that they designate as уборочный (adj. cleaning) while others do по чуть-чуть каждый день (a little bit every day). Even though most husbands do not помогать убирать (help to clean) for these ежедневный (daily) or еженедельный (weekly) chores, they do pitch in for генеральная уборка (spring cleaning) since it involves some heavy work and even minor repairs.

Мытьё (n. washing) – whether it is мытьё посуды (washing dishes), мытьё полов (mopping floors) or мытьё окон (window washing) it is a typically woman’s task. I still remember my mom standing bravely on the wide подоконник (window-sill) of our 5^th-floor apartment, washing the outside of the windows.

Готовка (n. cooking) – приготовление еды (preparing meals) isn’t always done by women. In fact, many men will boast of their excellent cooking skills, particularly when it comes to шашлык (shish kebab), жаркое (pot roast) or any number of meat and fish dishes. Occasional, typically holiday or picnic, cooking is what many men do eagerly and proudly. Yet the daily duties of preparing завтрак (breakfast), обед (dinner) and ужин (supper) are typically left entirely to women.

Стирка (n. laundry) – ok, to be fair, in the “good” old days of my Soviet childhood, way before my parents bought стиральная машина (clothes washer), my father helped somewhat. Specifically, he helped my mother отжать (to wring) large and heavy items, such as bedding. He was quite exceptional that way, the only man in our entire подъезд (block of apartments) to do so. I guess now that washing machines are no longer luxury items, men don’t help much with this either.

Глажка (n. ironing) – I once did a quick survey of how many of my friends’ husbands knew where their wives kept гладильная доска (ironing board) and утюг (iron). And let me tell you, there wasn’t much difference between American and Russian men on this one.

So what’s left now that cleaning, washing, cooking, laundry and ironing are done? How about покупка продуктов (grocery shopping)? It is not always solely a woman’s responsibility though. Many husbands help, particularly with подвезти до магазина (driving to the store) and поднести тяжёлые сумки (carrying heavy bags). After that, there are just such мелочи (little things) like полив цветов (watering flowers), уход за домашними животными (taking care of house pets), and занятие детьми (here: taking care of children). Oh, and she shouldn’t forget to вынести мусор (take out trash).

Little wonder that at the end of the day women валятся с ног (dropping with fatigue). Oh, and most have full-time jobs as well. So you can frequently hear women using the following phrases to describe this situation of continuous загруженность (heavy workload):

Я верчусь, как белка в колесе целый день, а он приходит с работы и сразу за компьютер – устал, видите ли (I am spinning like a squirrel in a wheel all day and he comes from work and gets on his computer right away because he’s tired)

Вы, Марина, просто святая – на Вас весь дом держится (You, Marina, are a saint – the entire household rests on your shoulders)

Я, как Золушка, в доме за всеми убираю (I am like Cinderella, cleaning after everyone in the house)

Пашу, как лошадь, что на работе, что дома (I work like a horse both at home and at work)

У тебя муж просто ангел – и по хозяйству помогает и с дочкой занимается (Your husband is an angel what with helping you around the house and taking care of your daughter).

Я считаю, что убирать со стола – не мужское дело (I believe that cleaning up after a meal is not a man’s job)

Вот у Наташи в доме всегда чисто и уютно. Как она всё успевает, просто ума не приложу (Natasha’s house is always clean and cozy. How she manages to get it all done, I have no idea)

Now that you’ve learned these new phrases, tell us what are your least favorite or most favorite chores? Do you like подстригать газон (mow the lawn), мыть машину (wash the car), возить детей на футбол (drive children to soccer practice)? What are some chores that you do that I haven’t included in this post?

If you have the time, you might like the Russian-language sitcom Сваты. Much of it is available on YouTube. It’s a good sitcom to practice conversational Russian as well as to try to figure out who’s who in this crazy extended family.

Want to play a quick game of associations? I’m going to say (ok, write) a word and you quickly reply with whatever word comes to mind. Ready? Here we go: FAMILY…

Now, play this game with a native Russian speaker: СЕМЬЯ… and they will likely respond with ячейка общества. The набившая оскомину (here: overused, old and boring) Soviet phrase семья – ячейка общества can be translated as “family is society’s fundamental unit”. So let’s talk about this fundamental unit.

Russians have plenty of words that describe family ties. And many are confusing. It all starts with свадьба (wedding). In English language men and women simply get married. In Russian, a woman выходит замуж while a man женится:

• Не хочу учиться, а хочу жениться! (I don’t want to study, I want to get married) says Mitrofanushka (diminutive of a man’s name Митрофан) in Denis Fonvizin’s comedy Недоросль (The Minor).
• Уж замуж невтерпёж (Already can’t wait to get married) is a phrase sometimes used as in articles for and about women. By the way, it is a very handy mnemonics for a grammar rule: all adverbs ending in sibilant consonants (ж, ч, ш, щ) must end with a soft sign (ь) except these three – уж (already), замуж (marry), невтерпёж (can’t bear any longer).

As we already discussed, молодожёны (young couple) acquires not just their вторая половинка (second half) or спутник/спутница жизни (masculine/feminine life partner), but a whole new extended family.

Жена (wife) gets свекровь (husband’s mother) and свёкор (husband’s father) and becomes невестка (daughter-in-law) to the husband’s entire family, except for the father. To her father-in-law, she is сноха (daughter-in-law). If her husband is not the only child in the family, his брат (brother) becomes wife’s деверь (brother-in-law) while сестра (sister) becomes wife’s золовка (sister-in-law).

• У меня дома аврал. Завтра свекровь со свёкром приезжают и мы все готовимся. (It’s crunch time at home. My husband’s parents are arriving tomorrow and we are getting everything ready)
• Я у золовки, за детьми присматриваю, пока она в магазин поехала за молоком. (I am at my brother’s sister, watching the children, while she went to pick up milk)

Муж (husband) gets тёща (wife’s mother) and тесть (wife’s father) and becomes their зять (son-in-law). If his wife is not the only child, her brother becomes husband’s шурин (brother-in-law) while sister becomes свояченица (sister-in-law).

• У меня шурин – электрик, вот и помог с ремонтом. (My wife’s brother is an electrician and helped me out with remodeling).
• Свояченица со свояком разводятся и она пока у нас живёт (My wife’s sister and her husband are getting divorced and for now she is staying with us).

As stories go, долго ли, коротко ли (after a while), супруги (husband and wife) become родители (parents) when they have their own bundle of joy, сын (a son) or дочь (a daughter).

Now all those parents-in-law become бабушки (grandmothers) and дедушки (grandfathers) and start doing their best spoiling their внук (grandson) or внучка (granddaughter). And sisters- and brothers-in-law now call themselves дядя (uncle) and тётя (aunt).

• У меня шесть младших братьев и сестёр. Пока что у них нет детей, так что на Новый год моя дочка получает гору подарков не только от бабушек и дедушек, но и от всех дядь и тёть. (I have six younger brothers and sisters. They don’t have children yet, so come the New Year my daughter gets a pile of gifts not just from the grandmothers and grandfathers, but from all the uncles and aunts as well).

But what about the two sets parents of the happily married couple? After all, they become each others родственники (relatives) as well. They become сваты (parents of a child’s spouse) – сват (father of child’s spouse) and сватья (mother of a child’s spouse). This might be particularly confusing because there is a similar-sounding Russian word сваха means a match-maker.

Even more relatives join the extended family after a child gets baptized. First, there are крёстный отец (godfather) or simply крёстный and крёстная мать (godmother) or simply крёстная. These godmother and godfather become  кум and кума not just to the families of their крестник (godson) or крестница (goddaughter), but to each other as well.

Finally, let’s talk about cousins or двоюродные братья (male cousins) and двоюродные сёстры (female cousins) who might also be the old-fashioned and now rarely-used кузены (male cousins) and кузины (female cousins). Not much to say here other than when cousins grow up and have children of their own, these children become троюродные сёстры (females) and троюродные братья (males) to each other. When they grow up and have children, these kids become четвероюродные brothers and sisters to each other. Same goes for дядя, тётя, племянник (nephew) and племянница (niece) ties between cousins and their children. The words are the same, but the adjective двоюродный/ая is added.

And now it’s practice time. Get out your family album and look through it figuring out who’s who in your extended family. And don’t forget about yourself. For example, I am мама, жена, дочь, племянница, двоюродная тётя of two adorable двоюродные племянницы, троюродная сестра and, of course, сноха и невестка. It’s your turn now.

I love good sci-fi (this is not an endorsement of this particular book since I haven’t read it). The phrase братья по разуму (lit: intellectual brethren) is sometimes used to describe intelligent (and presumably friendly) space aliens. In this case the aliens are not only unattractive, but definitely unfriendly. 

This post’s idea comes from Richard who mentioned that he was confused by the noun нежить (lit: the undead) that he encountered reading Nabokov’s story “The Wood Sprite”. Indeed, the noun нежить (undead) sounds exactly like the verb нежить (to pamper), but the meanings of the two words couldn’t be more different. False cognates strike again!

As you’ve undoubtedly realized by now, the noun нежить is related to the verb жить (to live). In fact, one of the definitions of the word нежить is всё, что не живёт человеком, что живёт без души и без плоти, но в виде человека… (everything that is not a human being, that lives without soul and flesh, but in human likeness). Simply put нежить не живёт и не умирает (the undead neither live nor die).

This would be a good post for Halloween, don’t you think?

There are quite a few nouns in the Russian language that are formed according to the same principle as нежить:

Неуч (ignoramus) is someone who не учится (does not study). So a teacher might scold нерадивый ученик (lazy, negligent student): А ты, Петров, как был неучем, так им и останешься (And you, Petrov, have always been an ignoramus and will remain such forever).

Нелюдим (misanthrope) is someone who не с людьми (is not around other people, a loner). Я думала, что мой начальник меня терпеть не может, а он просто нелюдим. (I thought my boss hated my guts, but he’s just a misanthrope).

Недруг (enemy) is someone who is не друг (not a friend) as in the old saying без недруга веку не изжить (can’t live out one’s life without having an enemy).

Незнайка (a know-nothing) literally не знает (does not know) much. It is a character from a popular children’s book that also features a character named Знайка (the know-it-all). An adult know-nothing is невежда since he or she не ведает (does not know). Невежда is an old-fashioned word much like the word it came from, ведать (to know).

Somewhat confusingly, the alike-sounding невежа (a boor) is someone who is не вежливый (is not polite). As this quote from Приключения Незнайки и его друзей (Adventures of Know-Nothing and His Friends) shows: Если … какой-нибудь малыш даже скажет обидное слово малышке, то над ним все смеялись и говорили, что он невоспитанный невежа, который незнаком с самыми простыми правилами приличного поведения. (If… a boy were to say rude words to a girl, then all would laugh at him and say that he was an ill-mannered boor, unfamiliar with even the simplest rules of proper behavior.)

Недоделка is an unfinished item, something that is не доделано (is not completely done). Another good word is недоработка, something that is not up to standard yet. Я – человек быстро увлекающийся и легко отвлекающийся, так что у меня больше недоделок, чем поделок. (I am quick to get into something, yet easily distracted.  As a result, I have more unfinished projects/crafts than finished ones.)

Невольник is a rather высокопарный (highfaluting) word that means someone who lacks воля (free will, freedom). In other words, it’s a slave. The most famous line that uses this word is probably the opening of Lermontov’s poem: Погиб поэт! – невольник чести… (The poet’s dead! – a slave to honor…)

Неурядица is probably my most favorite word in this list. Sure, its meaning isn’t all that pleasant – trouble, woe, confusion. But it comes from the word ряд (here: order, harmony). The old Russian уряд (order, rule) is no longer used, but порядок (order) is as popular as ever. После длительной череды финансовых неурядиц Росавиация аннулировала сертификат «Авиановы» (After a long streak of financial trouble, Rosaviatsiya (Federal Air Transportation agency) withdrew Avianova’s (Russian low-cost air carrier) certificate.

This is not исчерпывающий список (an exhaustive list) of Russian не (no) words. Feel free to add more. And if you have a question, let me know and I’ll blog you the answer (or at least something entertaining and educational).