{"id":4869,"date":"2014-01-13T15:03:31","date_gmt":"2014-01-13T15:03:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/?p=4869"},"modified":"2014-01-12T18:13:21","modified_gmt":"2014-01-12T18:13:21","slug":"hirschhausens-column-gehirn-und-geist-signing-signatures","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/hirschhausens-column-gehirn-und-geist-signing-signatures\/","title":{"rendered":"Hirschhausen\u2019s Column \u201eGehirn und Geist\u201c: Signing Signatures"},"content":{"rendered":"

One of my favorite German comedians and cabaret artists is Dr. med. (MD) Eckart von Hirschhausen<\/a>, a \u201ejack of all trades\u201c. First of all, Hirschhausen is a doctor. But he is also a writer, comedian, cabaret artist, conjurer, and host of different German shows.<\/span><\/p>\n

His secret of success is that he knows how to combine scientific facts with comedic performance. The topic of all of his publications and performances as a comedian is medicine, especially the field of neurology.<\/span><\/p>\n

Some weeks ago I visited the premiere of his current program \u201eWunderheiler\u201c <\/a>(faith healer) in which he adresses himself to self-regulating forces and how our thoughts and believes can contribute to our physical recovery.<\/span><\/p>\n

Unfortunately, cabaret is not made to be retold, that\u2019s why forbear to bore you. But since Eckart von Hirschhausen is also a writer I can share one on his articles with you. And don\u2019t worry, I will not leave you out in the rain and translated the text into English.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

HIRSCHHAUSENS HIRNSCHMALZ<\/span> (<\/b>HIRSCHHAUSENS BRAINPOWER)<\/b><\/b><\/h2>\n

\u201eBitte hier unterschreiben!\u201c<\/span> (<\/b>\u201cPlease sign here!\u201d)<\/b><\/b><\/h3>\n

ECKART VON HIRSCHHAUSEN \/ Translation by Sandra R\u00f6sner<\/p>\n

Das Schlimmste bei der Er\u00f6ffnung eines neuen Bankkontos oder sonstigem hochoffiziellem Zeug ist f\u00fcr mich die Unterschrift.<\/span> (The worst thing for me about opening a new bank account or any other highly official stuff is the signature.) Da legt man eine Standardversion der eigenen Sauklaue fest, die dann f\u00fcr alle Zeit gilt.<\/span> (You create a standard version of your own scrawl, which will then be valid until doomsday.) Und wehe, man unterschreibt irgendwann einmal schwungvoll ein bisschen anders\u00a0\u2013 Storno!<\/span> (And don\u2019t you dare to sign energetically a bit differently at another time \u2013 reversal!) Wie viele Auftr\u00e4ge kamen schon zur\u00fcck, weil irgendein Computer meinte, ich sei mit mir selbst nicht identisch.<\/span> (How many orders have been cancelled because some computer reckoned I wasn\u2019t identical equal with myself.) Entschuldigung?<\/span> (Sorry?) Als Arzt habe ich vor allem eins gelernt: unleserlich zu unterschreiben.<\/span> (As a doctor I pre-eminently learned to sign unreadable!) Das ist ein eigener Kurs im Medizinstudium, streng geheim, nennt sich “Retrograde Kalligrafie”<\/span>.(That\u2019s a separate class in medical studies, top secret, and is called \u201cRetrograde Calligraphy\u201c.)<\/p>\n

Fr\u00fcher war es eine der wichtigsten F\u00e4higkeiten von Apothekern, die Handschrift der \u00c4rzte in ihrer Umgebung deuten zu k\u00f6nnen.<\/span> (It used to be one of the most important skills of pharmacists to interpret the handwritings of the doctors in their immediate vicinity.) Inzwischen werden, um peinliche Verwechslungen zu vermeiden, alle Rezepte ausgedruckt.<\/span> (Meanwhile, all prescriptions are printed to avoid embarrassing confusions.) Aber die Unterschrift blieb.<\/span> (But the signature remained.) Denn sie gilt in unserem Rechtssystem immer noch als der Beweis, etwas gelesen zu haben und zu verantworten.<\/span> (Because in our legal system it is still considered as evidence that we have read something and that we are responsible for it.) Woher kommt diese fast magische Bedeutung der eigenen Handschrift?<\/span> (Where does this almost magical significance of one\u2019s own handwriting come from?) Geht ein Teil meiner Pers\u00f6nlichkeit beim Akt des \u201eVerifizierens\u201c in die Akten \u00fcber?<\/span> (Does one part of my personality emit into the files while the act of \u201cverifying\u201d?) Warum wird um das Unterschreiben von Vertr\u00e4gen oder das Signieren Goldener B\u00fccher so ein Gewese gemacht?<\/span> (Why do people make such a fuss about signing contracts or autograph visitors\u2019 books?) Ich habe nie verstanden, warum Autogrammj\u00e4ger stundenlang im Regen vor dem roten Teppich ausharren, um einen “Teil” ihres Stars zu ergattern\u00a0\u2013 pars pro toto sozusagen: wenn schon nicht Scarlett Johansson, so doch ihr Gekrakel f\u00fcr immer bei sich haben.<\/span> (I never understood why autograph hunters stay in the rain for hours before the red carpet to get hold of a \u201cpart\u201d of their celebrity \u2013 pars pro toto, so to speak: when I cannot have Scarlett Johannes for real, then at least carrying her scribbling forever.)<\/p>\n

Die Psychologin Lisa Shu von der Northwestern University fand gemeinsam mit Forscherkollegen heraus, dass auch wir selbst unserer Unterschrift gro\u00dfe Bedeutung zumessen.<\/span> (Psychologist Lisa Shu and her co-researcher from the Northwester University found out that we ourselves ascribe major importance to our signature.) Es macht sogar einen Unterschied, an welcher Stelle eines Dokuments wir unseren Wilhelm platzieren!<\/span> (It even matters where we put our John Hancock on a document!)<\/p>\n

Hand aufs Herz: Wie ehrlich sind Sie beim Ausf\u00fcllen von Frageb\u00f6gen, Steuererkl\u00e4rungen oder Versicherungsformularen?<\/span> (Be honest: Are you always candid when you fill questionnaires, tax declarations or insurance forms?) Klar, normalerweise liest man sich den ganzen Schmonzes durch, kreuzt mal hier was an, l\u00e4sst da mal eine Null weg oder rundet beim Schadenswert gro\u00dfz\u00fcgig auf.<\/span> (Of course, you usually read through all of the balderdash, tick here something, leave out a zero there or round up the amount of damage generously.) Als letzter Akt erfolgt die Unterschrift.<\/span> (Finally, you have to affix your signature.) Man dr\u00fcckt ein Auge zu, das andere macht man gar nicht erst auf, und ab in die Post damit.<\/span> (You turn one blind eye, don\u2019t even open the other one and off we go to mail.)<\/p>\n

Das geht besser, sagen die Forscher.<\/span> (There\u2019s a better way to do this, the researchers say.) Wer ehrliche Angaben m\u00f6chte, sollte ein Formular erst signieren und dann ausf\u00fcllen lassen.<\/span> (Those who want to provide honest information should sign a form first and fill it afterwards.) Ihre Experimente zeigten: War die Unterschrift erst am Schluss n\u00f6tig, mogelten die Versuchspersonen eher.<\/span> (Their experiments revealed: When the signature was only needed at the end the subjects tended to cheat.) Sie behaupteten, mehr Rechenaufgaben gel\u00f6st zu haben, oder gaben f\u00fcr ihre Fahrtkosten einen l\u00e4ngeren Anfahrtsweg an.<\/span> (They claimed to have solved more arithmetic problems or quoted a longer access route for their travel costs.) Mussten sie jedoch oben auf dem Bogen unterschreiben, lagen ihre Angaben n\u00e4her an der Wahrheit.<\/span> (However, when they had to sign at the top of the sheet their data were closer to the truth.)<\/p>\n

Gilt das auch im richtigen Leben?<\/span> (Is this also true in real life?) Im Auftrag der Forscher verwendete eine Autoversicherung zwei Versionen eines Formulars, auf dem die Kunden den Kilometerstand ihres Fahrzeugs angeben mussten.<\/span> (On the behalf of the researchers, a car insurance used two versions of a form on which the customers had to quote the mileage of their vehicles.) Verlockend: Je k\u00fcrzer die gefahrene Strecke, desto g\u00fcnstiger die Pr\u00e4mie.<\/span> (Tempting: The shorter the driven destination, the cheaper the premium.) Wer oben statt unten auf dem Bogen signierte, dass seine Angaben der Wahrheit entsprachen, gab im Schnitt zehn Prozent mehr Fahrleistung an!<\/span> (Those who had signed at the top of the sheet that their information had been truthful quoted on average ten percent more driving performance.) Eine gro\u00dfe Wirkung f\u00fcr einen kleinen Unterschied.<\/span> (A great effect for a little difference.) Liest Finanzminister Sch\u00e4uble eigentlich “Gehirn und Geist”?<\/span> (Does Finance Minister Sch\u00e4uble read \u201cBrain and Mind\u201c?)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Source:\u00a0http:\/\/www.gehirn-und-geist.de\/alias\/hirschhausens-hirnschmalz\/bitte-hier-unterschreiben\/1215536<\/a><\/address>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

One of my favorite German comedians and cabaret artists is Dr. med. (MD) Eckart von Hirschhausen, a \u201ejack of all trades\u201c. First of all, Hirschhausen is a doctor. But he is also a writer, comedian, cabaret artist, conjurer, and host of different German shows. His secret of success is that he knows how to combine…<\/p>\n

Continue Reading<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":54,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"content-type":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[238449,12033,2588],"class_list":["post-4869","post","type-post","status-publish","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-eckart-von-hirschhausen","tag-german-text","tag-translation"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4869","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/54"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4869"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4869\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4872,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4869\/revisions\/4872"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4869"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4869"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/german\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4869"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}