{"id":618,"date":"2015-02-17T02:47:19","date_gmt":"2015-02-17T07:47:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/indonesian\/?p=618"},"modified":"2015-07-22T12:40:51","modified_gmt":"2015-07-22T16:40:51","slug":"love-and-courtship-in-indonesian-culture","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/indonesian\/love-and-courtship-in-indonesian-culture\/","title":{"rendered":"Love and Courtship in Indonesian Culture"},"content":{"rendered":"

In Indonesia, where family plays an important role in partner selection, a courtship and finding the right partner is a family affair. Most parents believe that the best candidates for their future daughter or son-in-law should have a good background based on the crucial aspects of \u201cBibit, Bebet, Bobot\u201d which has a Javanese origin, referring respectively to family wealth, social rank, and ancestry.\u00a0 Parents believe that their future in-laws should at least come from the same social status and religion.<\/p>\n

\"Cincinkawin\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Indonesian culture places higher importance on the acceptance and approval of community or family. Therefore, at the early courtship, both sides try their best to be accepted by their parents. There is a saying in Indonesia, \u201cKalau kita menikah, kita juga menikah dengan keluarga\u201d which means when you marry your girlfriend or boyfriend, you also marry the family. The engagement period is rarely recognized in Indonesia, as the couples move to the marital stages soon after a long courtship.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"PengantinJawa\"<\/a><\/p>\n

\"BukuNikah\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Young people in Indonesia usually develop a romantic interest in Junior High School (Sekolah Menengah Pertama or SMP) when they are around 12 years of age.\u00a0 Even though, they are involved in a romantic relationship (berpacaran or pacaran), they spend most of their time with friends, siblings or family. \u00a0They rarely go out on their own. \u00a0Parents usually urge their youngster to focus on education and discourage them from having an early romantic relationship. \u00a0They often tell their children that they are \u201cmasih kecil\u201d, meaning, they are still a child or too young to date.<\/p>\n

Young men who have a romantic relationship while they are still in Middle School or High School, commonly visit the girl in her house.\u00a0 Although a boyfriend may visit his girlfriend on Malam Minggu (Saturday Night), they spend time with the girlfriend\u2019s family. They watch TV, have interesting conversations, or play guitar and sometimes, the boyfriend also brings with him his male friends to hang out with them.<\/p>\n

\"pacaran\"<\/a><\/p>\n

When couples go out, they usually go to the movies, eat at street food vendors \u201cwarung\u201d while having a conversation to get to know each other better. They don\u2019t show physical intimacy openly, but holding hands is acceptable. \u00a0However, Indonesians are increasingly doing more than just holding hands in public.\u00a0 \u201cKencan\u201d or dating is also gaining acceptance in Indonesian society as a path that does not always lead to long courtships and marriage.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Related terms and words:<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
Indonesian <\/strong><\/td>\nEnglish<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Malam Minggu<\/td>\nSaturday night<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Berpacaran or pacaran<\/td>\nExclusive dating<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Kencan<\/td>\nDating<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Pacar<\/td>\nBoyfriend or Girlfriend<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Bertunangan<\/td>\nTo Engage with someone<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Tunangan<\/td>\nFianc\u00e9 or fianc\u00e9e<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Menikah<\/td>\nTo be married; married<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Calon mertua<\/td>\nFuture in-laws<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Berpegangan tangan<\/td>\nHolding hands<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Cinta monyet<\/td>\nMonkey love<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

Images were taken from Flickr.com\/creative commons<\/p>\n

1. By Lan Rasso<\/p>\n

2. by Dony Ismanto<\/p>\n

2. by Tamahaji<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\"\"

In Indonesia, where family plays an important role in partner selection, a courtship and finding the right partner is a family affair. Most parents believe that the best candidates for their future daughter or son-in-law should have a good background based on the crucial aspects of \u201cBibit, Bebet, Bobot\u201d which has a Javanese origin, referring…<\/p>\n

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