{"id":4055,"date":"2013-10-11T19:05:00","date_gmt":"2013-10-11T19:05:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/?p=4055"},"modified":"2013-10-11T20:01:01","modified_gmt":"2013-10-11T20:01:01","slug":"last-chance-caff-before-the-land-of-laa-ay","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/last-chance-caff-before-the-land-of-laa-ay\/","title":{"rendered":"Last Chance Caffè before the Land of Laa – ay"},"content":{"rendered":"

Part 1. The Sad farewell<\/font><\/p>\n

We\u2019re heading north, the vast flat expanse of la Pianura Padana<\/strong> begins to undulate, the first sign that we\u2019ll soon be leaving l\u2019Italia<\/strong> and entering la Svizzera<\/strong>. But before we cross that border we have something very important to do. We pull off the autostrada<\/strong> into a familiar service station. The car doesn\u2019t need fuel, but we<\/em> do, and this humble looking establishment is our last chance to savour a genuine cappuccio<\/strong> (cappuccino<\/strong>) before we pass into the lands of the Northern \u2018barbarians\u2019, where our treasured beverage becomes either too expensive, too disgusting, or both at the same time!<\/p>\n

Maybe you think I\u2019m exaggerating? What a shame I didn\u2019t have my camera with me, because I would have taken you a nice photo of the desperate crowd of \u2018last caff\u00e8-ers\u2019 huddled around the bar, the barista<\/strong> (bar man) with his arms flailing around like a maniac octopus trying to keep up with the orders, and the girl who was working relentlessly to liberate il banco<\/strong> (the bar) from the precarious pyramidal piles of empty coffee cups. Welcome to the Last Chance Caff\u00e8, our pet name for this otherwise unremarkable motorway service area.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Part 2. The Confusing Arrival<\/font><\/p>\n

We\u2019ve made it to Good Old Blighty, relatively unscathed apart from an unpleasant brush with a cup of something insipid masquerading as caff\u00e8 in a Belgian youth hostel (yes, we should have known better!). An emergency thermos flask helped fortify us by furnishing extra cups of tea along the way. But now we\u2019re in England, the \u2018Land of The Cup of Tea\u2019, and everything will be all right \u2026 won\u2019t it?<\/p>\n

Our brave little FIAT Punto, who\u2019s feeling very proud of herself for having carried us across Europe, is in need of a drink of good old 95 octane<\/strong><\/font>. And we are not adverse to the idea of a jolly nice cuppa. But wait, what\u2019s this, as I cue to pay for the petrol I discover that the payment area is also a \u2018bar\u2019, well how chic! And sure enough as I stand uncomfortably in the \u2018queue\u2019 (Note: not pronounced kwayway, as an Italian might expect!, but what a peculiarly British invention, does now one trust anyone?)<\/em> the man in front of me orders something called a \u2018Laa \u2013 ay\u2019. What on earth could that be? I ask myself, glancing suspiciously up at the menu \u2026<\/p>\n

\u2026 and yes there it is, confirmation that my fellow countrymen and women have totally lost the plot: Latte \u00a32.50. \u201cIs that a normal laa \u2013 ay or an extra laa \u2013 ay?\u201d the employee asks innocently. I writhe and cringe with embarrassment and supress the urge to shout and rant at the other customers: <\/p>\n

1) IT\u2019S PRONOUNCED LATTAY NOT LAA – AY, THAT\u2019S NOT SO DIFFICULT IS, IT? <\/strong><\/em><\/font><\/p>\n

2) LATTE IS ITALIAN FOR MILK, NOT HALF A LITRE OF DISHWATER SERVED IN A CARDBOARD MUG. <\/strong><\/em><\/font><\/p>\n

3) IF YOU WANT LATTE MACCHIATO (its correct name) GO TO ITALY. <\/strong><\/em><\/font><\/p>\n

4) WE\u2019RE IN AN ENGLISH SERVICE STATION AND THEY DON\u2019T EVEN HAVE TEA ON THE MENU \u2026 WAKE UP PEOPLE \u2026 YOU\u2019RE THROWING AWAY YOUR HERITAGE!!!<\/strong><\/em><\/font><\/p>\n

But I don\u2019t, of course. Instead, I meekly wait my turn in the queue, pay for my petrol with a smile and a thank you, then go back to the car to rant about lost cultures with poor Serena.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Part 3. \u2026 and they all lived happily ever after!<\/font><\/p>\n

I\u2019m sure you\u2019ll all be relieved to hear that Serena and I finally found a fantastic tea rooms in Lavenham, Suffolk (Munnings Tea Room<\/font><\/strong><\/a><\/font><\/font>, very friendly staff), not far from my birthplace, and not a Laa \u2013 ay in sight. A genuine pot of Assam tea was placed before us on the lace tablecloth, along with one of the most heavenly home made scones we\u2019ve ever tasted, served with enough clotted cream to sink a battleship, the same amount of butter, strawberry jam and a real strawberry sprinkled with sugar. Now this is the British cultural equivalent of a great cappuccino and a lovely warm brioche. This is what coming to Great Britain is all about!  <\/p>\n

My message to you: Treasure what\u2019s best in your culture, protect it , in fact: demand it! Don\u2019t sell yourself short, for example, by ordering crap masquerading as cappuccino<\/strong> or latte macchiato<\/strong> in a British service station. If you don\u2019t buy it they can\u2019t sell it. Cultural traditions are an essential part of who we are, but sometimes we take what\u2019s close to us for granted and then you find that, in the immortal words of Joni Mitchell\u2019s song \u2018Big Yellow Taxi\u2019: \u201cyou don\u2019t know what you\u2019ve got till it\u2019s gone.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Right, time for another cuppa, methinks.<\/font><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Part 1. The Sad farewell We\u2019re heading north, the vast flat expanse of la Pianura Padana begins to undulate, the first sign that we\u2019ll soon be leaving l\u2019Italia and entering la Svizzera. But before we cross that border we have something very important to do. We pull off the autostrada into a familiar service station…<\/p>\n

Continue Reading<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":90,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"content-type":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[292123,292124],"class_list":["post-4055","post","type-post","status-publish","hentry","category-culture","tag-cappuccino","tag-latte-macchiato"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4055","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/90"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4055"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4055\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4066,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4055\/revisions\/4066"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4055"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4055"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/italian\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4055"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}