{"id":557,"date":"2021-11-30T04:30:46","date_gmt":"2021-11-30T04:30:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/vietnamese\/?p=557"},"modified":"2021-11-30T04:36:34","modified_gmt":"2021-11-30T04:36:34","slug":"vietnamese-marriage-customs-1-le-dam-hoi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.transparent.com\/vietnamese\/vietnamese-marriage-customs-1-le-dam-hoi\/","title":{"rendered":"Vietnamese Marriage Customs (1) \u2013 L\u1ec5 D\u1ea1m H\u1ecfi"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Photo by Beatriz P\u00e9rez Moya on Unsplash<\/p><\/div>\n

If you are thinking of getting married to a Vietnamese whose family follows tradition, prepare yourself both mentally and financially for the process! There are steps to follow with a series of events. It could be stressful and tiresome, perhaps even headache inducing, and a hassle. Nonetheless, the events are beautiful, joyous, and memorable when you will look back. No pain, no gain; right?<\/p>\n

On an overseas trip back home to visit my parents, my husband had a heart-to-heart conversation with my late father regarding the Vietnamese traditional marriage customs, to which my husband experienced and went through in order to marry me. My dad laughed and commented: \u201cWith all seriousness, there is a reason for it. It\u2019s something you\u2019ll never want to endure again. Once in your lifetime is enough. Therefore, you better just stick with one marriage!\u201d. In other words, better stick with your wife, because it\u2019s a lot of trouble and effort to marry another one!<\/p>\n

In the past, similar to Chinese traditions, the marriage customs were pretty complicated with many steps. In modern days, it has been streamlined and modified quite a lot for convenience. Basically, there still are five steps\/events for the couple to go through, with three major ceremonies. These procedural customs are:<\/p>\n

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  1. L\u1ec5 <\/em>d<\/em>\u1ea1m h\u1ecfi<\/em>: It\u2019s a meet and greet v\u00edsitation when permission for the boy to see\/date the girl is asked).<\/li>\n
  2. L\u1ec5 \u0103n h\u1ecfi\/ L\u1ec5 \u0111\u00ednh h\u00f4n<\/em>: It\u2019s the engagement ceremony with betrothal gift<\/li>\n
  3. L\u1ec5 c\u01b0\u1edbi, include l\u1ec5 xin d\u00e2u, l\u1ec5 \u0111\u00f3n d\u00e2u, and l\u1ec5 l\u1ea1i m\u1eb7t<\/em>: It\u2019s the wedding ceremony, to include: collecting the bride (bride procession), receiving the bride, and after-wedding visitation to the bride\u2019s parents ceremony.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Don\u2019t freak out. It sounds like a lot but all the steps are natural and logical.<\/p>\n

    Since it\u2019s too much information to squeeze into one blog, this will be the first of three blogs describing each of the three main ceremonies in order.<\/p>\n

    L\u1ec5 d\u1ea1m h\u1ecfi <\/em><\/strong>or <\/em><\/strong>L\u1ec5 d\u1ea1m ng\u1ecf or L\u1ec5 ch\u1ea1m ng\u00f5 <\/em><\/strong>\u00a0or <\/em><\/strong>L\u1ec5 xem m\u1eb7t<\/em><\/strong> or <\/em><\/strong>L\u1ec5 v\u1ea5n danh<\/em><\/strong>.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

    The name is called something slightly different, depending on the region. This is the initial step of the marriage. Basically, it\u2019s the meet-and-greet between both familes. This gives the opportunity for the boy\u2019s family to learn more about the girl\u2019s family. This is a formal visit between the two families. It\u2019s is also for the boy\u2019s parents to ask the girl\u2019s parents permission for their son to have contacts with the girl to lead to a marriage later.<\/p>\n

    The boy\u2019s parents or a representative elder comes to the girl\u2019s house, bringing traditional gifts to include:<\/p>\n