When I came to the United States in the distant 2003, I was certain I had everything necessary to carry on a conversation beyond the the subjects of current weather and favorite things to eat. My arsenal consisted of mostly proper English language structures, a decent amount of polysyllabic adjectives, obsessive fixation on the English tenses, and a pretty good ability to understand spoken English.

It took me a few months to realize that I was lacking the most crucial component: confidence. I simply couldn’t say the words.

Among my new found friends and family, I quickly found myself building a reputation of someone who is very quiet and reserved. Dealing with this new “super quiet, keeps to herself, possibly looney” reputation was very hard for me because it was simply not accurate. I was never the loudest mouth of the party but I certainly had no problem putting my five cents in.

The reason why I found myself so tongue-tied was the fear of making mistakes, the fear of not coming across close to the way I come across in Russian, the fear that if I don’t put my words together just so, some serious IQ points will be taken down. I constantly felt like I was lacking speed: I was a dial-up modem who wanted to be a high speed one but couldn’t. If you have ever tried to communicate with a native speaker of the language you are studying, you probably know what I mean. I am referring to the Language Barrier.

Looking back at that time, I can clearly see most of the mistakes I made. I realize that we should strive for perfection but it should not paralyze our desire and ability to communicate. I hope the tips I have put together help you overcome your language barrier and look at the experience of learning a foreign language with renewed enthusiasm.

1. It is better to say it wrong than not to say it right

This tip goes back to the speed issue. When you are communicating with native speakers, more often than not you will feel that your response speed is considerably slower than theirs. Fight the urge to stay silent or just say anything. Do not focus on the right word or the right phrase, most likely the other person will help you figure it out as you go. If you spend the time to craft a perfect reply, they will have forgotten what you were talking about. Your response speed will get better with time.

2. Don’t expect all people to be understanding of the fact that you are trying to speak a foreign language

People who have never tried to speak a foreign language (and I mean really speak it, outside of the classroom setting) have no idea what you are dealing with, they have no idea how stressful it is and what it’s like to feel that your brain is going to explode after a 20 min conversation. When you have hit your processing capacity for the day, get some rest and then put yourself back in the action.

3. Use it or lose it!

Simple and true. The more you use the language, the easier the words are going to come out of your mouth and vice versa. You will remember the words better, you will learn new expressions, but most importantly you will hear yourself in the action and realize that nobody is going to eat you if you say things wrong.

4. Be selfish because it is about you!

See every person as a practice partner, not judge Judy. You should have little to no concern about  what other people think about how well you speak the language, how smart you are, how original you are, etc. Instead, focus on how this conversation will help you get better.

5. Watch movies, TV shows, documentaries in your target language, regularly!

TV-watching was one of the greatest tools in helping me overcome the language barrier. It can give you hundreds of real-life scenarios acted out by native speakers. Add subtitles to that and you can’t really beat the value it provides. A lot of Russian people I know keep watching Russian TV here in the US, keep associating with Russian people and then wonder why their English is not getting better. Watch TV! Find what you like and watch it! The first year of my TV-watching I didn’t understand half of what was being said, the second year it got much easier, now I understand everything with no subtitles.

6. If you are learning a new language while living in a country where it is spoken, find people who have interests similar to yours. Don’t cling to your own culture too much. Being around like-minded people can greatly speed up the learning process.

7. Finally, get out of your comfort zone immediately, to avoid the risk of being stuck there permanently!

I feel like there are so many more things that can be added to the list. If you have additional tips, please share in the comment section!

Всего хорошего!