Hello gorgeous! Шесть свежевыпеченных сметанников (из магазина) [six freshly baked ‘smetannikis’ (from the store)] and the celebration of November 4^th can begin!

This morning when I woke up late there was but one question on my unglossed lips – how should I celebrate today’s beautiful holiday? «Сегодня всё-таки “День народного единства”!» [Today is after all The Day of (People’s) Unity!] It used to be something else before, having to do with agreement and reconciliation, but as the Russians reconciled with the fact that it was just another name for the Day of the October Revolution, they agreed to find another day in November to commemorate instead. They didn’t have to look far – the victory from back in 1612 on this very same day was a clear as 70 years of Soviet Power to most citizens. (Forgive me my extremely dry Swedish sarcasm.) As drinking can sometimes, even in a land like this, become more of a tiring process with less than desirable results than leisure with pleasure, I have come up with suggestion of how to celebrate it differently. This suggestion will be not only liked, it will certainly be loved by each and everyone, people of all ages and nationalities. I suggest that we name the 4^th of November «Единый день народных сметанников» [United Day of People’s Smetanniki]. This day can be celebrated where ever these heavenly baked goods are sold or made or just found, which is, coincidentally, mainly within the borders of Russian Federation. No one is surprised, I assume, as «сметана» [sour crème; in it’s Slavic version] is first and foremost a Russian thing.

Few things are as lovely as what’s pictured above: «Чёрный кофе со сметанником» [Black coffee with a smetannik]. It might not be better than sex, but it is a strong and worthy runner up…

Of all the tasty pastries offered by the wonderful Russian kitchen (and there’s a lot of those!), nothing has ever hypnotized me in quite the same way as the Smetannik did. I first met the Smetannik when I moved to the Urals. I don’t know how popular it is in other regions, partly because I am not far too experienced in the area of «сладкое» [sweets], though I’ve tried my best. In Omsk I never saw any smetannikis. In Yekaterinburg I met my first Smetannik and ever since then all other sorts of sweets became… bleak. Tasteless. Uninteresting. Boring. Nothing could match the joy I experienced when I put my teeth in a soft Smetannik, which is basically two big cookies stuck together by a layer of sweet and sugary smetana. Sometimes it is covered in coconut, which is not really kosher, and that’s why I call those kinds Exotic Smetannikis. This Exotic kind is sold in the «столовая» [dining hall] at Ural State. They’re okay, but far from the best in town. The best kinds of smetannikis to be found in Yekaterinburg are sold by a little bakery located in the house of the local government. There they bake «для своих» [for ‘their own’] but if you walk in pretending like you’ve got some important business there and just happened to be in need of 8 smetannikis, it’s alright. There they have one woman who does them, when she’s not there – no smetannikis. She doesn’t work on the weekend. And she’s got almost a whole month off during the summer. Such things must be kept in mind.

There was a time when I could eat two or even three smetannikis per day. This was not very good. A smetannik contains almost only sugar and fat, and if you don’t count protein from the smetana, it almost completely useless to the human body as nutrition. That’s why I had to stop for a while, even though it made the world… colorless. Since today is the Holiday of Smetannikis (I’m writing a long letter with this suggestion to the president as we speak, mind you!) I think I will splurge and treat myself to two smetannikis. Three smetannikis often lead to all of them ending up in… you know where. Which is identical to the result of celebrating with alcohol, and that is, after all, not my intention when I suggest an alternative.

If you’re not in Russia, and nowhere near a Russian store or bakery, you could make them yourselves. I’ve never done it (I can’t cook and I’m very ashamed of this fact), but I’m sure they’ll be great – the beauty of the Smetannik is that you can never go wrong with it! It’s what is called something for eternity; one of the few things in human life made to last forever 🙂