The kind of stuff one can find on Internet without even trying never ceases to amaze me. For example, today I started off at Lenta.ru and drifted over to the brand-new «президент.рф» site, located on one of the first «нелатинский домен» [domain that does not use Roman alphabet].

While at президент.рф, I discovered that in addition to some other incentives aimed at reversing existing demographic decline, started to award a medal «Родительская Слава» [Glory of Parenthood] to families with 4 or more children.

I’m not sure how you feel about the idea of an award like this, but I personally feel that a shiny medal, a lapel pin, a framed diploma and a small financial contribution of about USD 1,700 aren’t going to be sufficient in solving «демографический кризис» [the demographic crisis]. I mean, I just can’t imagine a wife agreeing to have another child or two just for a chance to wear a lapel pin to the next «родительское собрание» [parent-teacher conference].

Of course, Russian government doesn’t stop at the medal. It has been steadily introducing new incentives and programs, but the outlook is still grim. Sources, unidentified in the Russian Wikipedia article, estimate that Russian population will decline to between 98 and 115 million by 2050.

The most entertaining of Russian politicians came up with a slew of exiting and unorthodox solutions, including preventing abortions by offering women a substantial financial reward in exchange for her yet-unborn children; legalizing polygamy as long as all marriages produce children; creating government-sponsored dating sites, singles cultural events and… sperm banks; and bringing orphans from world’s hot spots to be raised in Russia

Others came up with the idea of paying parents «зарплату за воспитание детей» [a salary for raising children]. I couldn’t find any official sources, but such proposition strikes me as sensible and moderate, especially in view of what you’ve read above and what you’re about to read below.

Imagine my excitement when I came across a draft proposal from «Миллиардная Россия» [Billion-Strong Russia]. The envisioned solution is more than a simple “population booster”. It is a magic pill that will solve a host of society’s worst problems, including single parents, unwed mothers, abandoned children, tax evasion, overcrowded prisons, and emigration. The piece de resistance is a complete solution of the retirement age problem; not only it will not have to be raised, but it can be reduced.

The key, apparently, is in a swiping «пенсионная реформа» [reform of retirement pay structure]. The way it works right now is employers pay part of payroll into the Federal Pension Fund for subsequent distribution to retirees.

Under the proposed system, this money will go from employers directly into their employees’ parents’ retirement savings accounts. The incentive to have more children is straightforward. After all, if Masha has 10 adult-age working children and Lena – just 1, guess who’s going to be living it large in the retirement?

Since this system would apply to both biological and adopted children, it will create an “adoption fever” that «приведет к опустению детских домов» [will leave orphanages empty].

Single mothers, especially with more than one child, will be transformed from unmarriageable to «завидные невесты» [desirable brides].

«Черный нал» [invisible and un-taxable cash] will disappear as “for cash” working arrangements will not contribute to parental retirement savings and «родители найдут способ воздействовать на своего ребенка, чтобы он выбирал компании, которые платят налоги» [parents will find a way to influence their child to choose a work place that pays taxes].

Raising «законопослушный» [law-abiding] and «патриотичный» [patriotic] children will become economically attractive for parents since they would get nothing from a child ending up in prison or emigrating.

And if parents don’t want to wait 20-25 years for their little one to start contributing (in view of the dismal life expectancy of an average Russian), they can start drawing out the funds as soon as the child is born, turning their newborn into a kind of a human credit card. No repayment of borrowed funds by parents is necessary as long as they forgo their share of the child’s future earnings (which, in this case, will go straight to the government to pay off the parents’ debt).

Accordingly to the author’s back-of-the-envelope estimates, Russia will, in no time, regain positive demographic momentum and population density even in the remotest reaches of Siberia will be on par with the European Russia.

Personally, I think that compared to this «проект» [draft], state-sponsored dating sites and sperm banks start to look like a darn good solution. What do you think?