School’s out! Finally, it’s time for летние каникулы (summer break). Before you head out to the beach, ask yourself this: нравится ли мне этот блог? получаю ли я от него удовольствие и/или пользу? (Do I like this blog? Do I get pleasure and/or usefulness from reading it?). If the answer is, then please голосуйте за нас, the Transparent Language blog, (vote for us) as your favorite language learning blog.

Since it’s summer now, let’s not be serious. Let’s have some fun and read a story that just might happen to you some day this summer. And if it doesn’t, at least you’ll learn some useful words and phrases.

Why does жаркая погода (hot weather) makes us want жарить еду на огне (to grill food), is a mystery, but it does. Personally, I prefer мангал (charcoal grill) even though с ним больше возни (it requires more work).

The most essential and most-often forgotten item when it comes to grilling is коробка спичек (a box of matches). Unless, of course, you can добывать огонь трением (start the fire by friction) or happen to have огниво (flint and steel).

As we know спички – детям не игрушка (matches aren’t for children to play with). So we tend to put them far enough away, с глаз долой (out of sight). Next thing we know, we can’t remember где лежат спички (where the matches are). Usually, it’s the moment when нам приспичивает (we feel a strong urge to immediately do something) to grill and there is not a moment to spare.

And so picture this: друзья на пороге (friends are at the door) and шашлык уже нанизан на шампуры (shish kebabs are already put on skewers) and we are в ажиотаже (frantically) searching the house for even just one спичка. Finally, a buddy who is курильщик (a smoker) hands us his matches or зажигалка (a lighter) and all is well again. Except we can’t stop thinking about where these проклятые спички (darn matches) are. The question втемяшился в голову (got drummed into our head) and we feel a headache coming over.

We might get so absorbed with this problem, that we have this absent-minded look on our face and keep scratching темя (top of the head) all the while remembering the curious fact that темя is one of only 10 Russian neuter nouns that end in -мя (if you are thinking this, then definitely vote for Transparent Language blog!)

But the get-together is going on and on and deep into the night, as all душевные (soulful) Russian get-togethers do. And so становится темно (it gets dark) and one of the guests jokingly asks дорогие гости, а не надоели ли вам хозяева (dear guests, aren’t you tired of the hosts yet). Everyone start собираться уходить (to get ready to leave). After another hour or so as everyone is still in the process of saying goodbyes, the same guest recalls an old joke

Англичане уходят, не прощаясь. Русские прощаются, но не уходят (British leave without saying goodbye. Russians say goodbye without leaving)

It’s dark in the hallway and a guest (can’t see which one, but likely the same шутник (joker)) reminds all that темнота – друг молодёжи (darkness is young people’s friend). But you flip the switch and stand in the lit doorway until the last guest leaves.

Пора спать (it’s time for bed) and посуда подождёт до утра (dishes can wait until morning). As you get ready for bed and reach for something on the top shelf of your платяной шкаф (wardrobe), you нащупывать что-то шершавое (feel something rough) – the rough side of the спичечный коробок (box of matches).

Here are some useful phrases next time you’re looking for matches:

Где спички? – Where are the matches?

Я не знаю, где спички – I do not know where the matches are

Спичек нет, но вот зажигалка – There are no matches, but here’s a lighter

Дожили, спичек в доме нет! – Look at what we’ve come to – there are no matches in the house!

Сейчас сгоняю за спичками – I’ll go buy matches right away

В коробке осталась лишь одна спичка – There is just one match left in the matchbox

Чёрт, последнюю спичку сломал! – Darn it, I broke the last match!

Когда я был в скаутах, нас учили разжигать костёр с одной спички – When I was in Scouts, I was taught to light a fire with a single match.