This article is so spot-on on the skills needed to live in Sweden, that I translated to English just for you guys. Enjoy! http://www.cafe.se/13-skills-du-behover-for-att-klara-dig-i-sverige/

13 skills you need to live in Sweden

In every country there are things that are specific to the place and the culture. And to survive in Sweden it is important to learn how to master these 13 skills.

1. Learn to parry when you slip

Instead of a single winter month, we have an entire winter semester. Therefore develops most Swedes an outstanding skill in case of sudden slipping, which in principle can occur anytime between October and April

2. Plan of alcohol purchases in advance

Are you craving a glass of wine after 15 o’clock on a Saturday? Too bad you would have thought of that earlier in the week.

3. Dedicate your life to find a home

Our housing shortage is (almost) as globally known as Ikea and Zlatan Ibrahimovic. So at the same time as your preschool teacher asks what you want to be when you grow up, you should also consider where you will be living – and put yourself in the housing queue. And if you already have a good home: Put all awake time in finding a better on Hemnet.

4. Have a strong opinion about these people:

Zlatan Ibrahimovic
The royals
Håkan Hellström

5 … not to mention the word “hen”.

6. Learn to budget

On the 25th of each month: “Finally, I am rich, now I’ll treat myself to things!”

The 2nd of every month: “Why, oh why is it not payday yet?”

7. Plan your life 24 months in advance

Should you get mobile, broadband, TV, gym membership or virtually any subscription at any time? It is easily fixed, as long as you are prepared to sign a subscription for at least a year. Hope you haven’t considered moving somewhere.

8. Obey the queues

Housing queue, healthcare queue, Phone queue – not to mention all the physical queues. We love to put us at the back of the crowd, not knowing what is happening at the front. Remember to keep a safe distance! You do not want to be perceived as a pusher.

9. Learn to master passive-aggression

When someone cuts in front of you in the queue, and you’re thinking all the way home on what you should have said and done then go complain to your friends that you know will be on your side.

10. Learn to pretend as if nothing has happened

Someone else: * I just bumped into that poor fellow. Equally good to pretend that nothing happened, so I do not have to talk to a stranger. *

You: * Someone bumped right into me. Might as well pretend as if nothing has happened, so I do not have to talk to a stranger. *

11. Do not get too close to someone you do not know

Try to keep a proper distance to other travelers in public transport, in cafes and other public places. You do not want to risk getting closer to someone than what you really are compelled to do.

12. Have an opinion about the weather

Let’s face it: Sooner or later you will have small talk with a stranger. Then you have to have the trump card ready: the weather. Fortunately there’s been at least three headlines on the papers this week with the latest on everything from “Russian heat” to “karate-in-stomach-cold” for inspiration.

13. Require your Christian leave

Swedes love to boast the country’s secularism, and that religion does not have any significance for us. Yet we are never late to require time off as soon as something Jesus-related show up in the calendar. And gladly half days before and days after too. It’s only fair.